Weird Dreams

I've been having lots of weird dreams lately. Most I don't remember, but here are a couple for your entertainment:

A week or so ago, I dreamt that I was at a big party -- a wedding or a funeral, perhaps -- and got really drunk. I ended up getting hitched to an old woman. In my dream, this made sense, even though I'm already married, to a man who happens to be mid-thirties, but you know how dreams are. In the dream I was also joking with Hubby that he should have married the old woman. When I started to sober up in my dream, I regretted marrying an old woman. I really didn't think I'd be able to er, consummate the relationship, and I knew my old lady (literally, in this case. Wait, can you use "literally" when describing a dream? Fantastically?) would be disappointed. Then I wondered why my mother, who was also at the party, had let me marry an old woman. Aren't mothers supposed to stop their kids from doing really stupid things, even if they're drunk, too?

Last night I had a dream that I was hanging out with a group of friends, though they were dream friends, meaning they don't exist in real life. In real life, I don't have any friends. Sob. Anyway, back to the dream. My "friends" and I were walking along, talking about girl stuff, and the conversation turned to Botox. I said I wanted to have it done, and there was a special going on....

This is when my alarm clock woke me up. I realized I was about to mention a Botox special in my dream, that is actually going on in real life. I saw in ad for it yesterday in The Woodinville Weekly, a cutting edge, journalistic tour de force of the rocking world that is Woodinville, WA, population "estimated to be 9900." This ad was for a local spa offering a great special on Botox for Halloween. Halloween day, from 9 to 6, you can get 10% off your 31 units of Botox! Plus, invite a friend and get $25 off your treatment! Hmmm. Botox on Halloween. Sounds Frankensteinian. Plus, 31 units? How is it possible to get that much Botox in your face? Can you still eat, drink, breathe, or blink after that much Botox? Sorry, I'm Botox ignorant, but I don't think I'd be desperate enough to get a discount on Botox (10%, though! Wow!) that I'd be willing to buy 31 UNITS of it to do so. Then again, if you get that much Botox, you can probably incorporate it into your Halloween costume -- "Person Frozen by Medusa", perhaps, or "Startled Over-the-Hill Starlet"? Still, if you need 31 units of Botox, the "before" is probably much more scary, therefore better for your Halloween costume - "Good God, What is That"?